PARENTS AND PLAYER GOALS EXPECTATIONS 

In anything you do in life, you need to set some goals that you personally want to achieve and the goals you want to achieve for a bigger group. In order to attain certain goals, one needs to follow certain guidelines and meet a bunch of expectations. 

What do you want? As a parent, you are also a “client” of the soccer club or high school team  and it is important to have expectations of what you expect your child’s soccer experience to be like over the course of the year. Ideally, you would want to know if the club or coach meet those expectations before you commit to be on the team or part of the club, but that is not always possible. Although your expectations need to be realistic to your child’s playing level and age group, it is good to share those expectations with your coach or club director. If you are not sure about what to expect, you should look into what is known as “best practices” for coaching or teaching of players of your child’s age group and playing level. You can also just ask the coach. Sit down and discuss what you should expect throughout the year when it comes to your child’s playing experience. From a player's stand point, this is what I would want my parents to do for me. 

What does the coach expect? All coaches are different and if you get the best coaches in the world in a single room to discuss what should be done to develop players and run a team over a season, there will be plenty of disagreement. Like many things, no one way is absolutely correct or absolutely wrong. Most approaches are a blend of what is know to be the best approach to help players and a coach’s personal philosophy or approach. The key is the purpose behind expectations and what is being done. Is it for short-term or long-term goals, is it based on research or just “that’s how it was done when I played”, or is it coach focuses or player focused. These key distinctions make a big difference in terms of the experience being a positive one for the player. Again, two coaches who have a long-term developmental approach, based on best practices and is player focused will possibly have very different expectations and approaches to the season. Parents and players need to have a very good understanding of what the coach’s expectations will be.  Remember, the coaches are part of the to the player's success. 

What does the club expect? Clubs are as diverse as coaches, players, and parents. All clubs have different goals and missions for their teams in different age groups and levels of competition. It is important to be clear on the club’s expectations in terms of leagues, tournaments, amount of traveling, the amount of training, playing time, and overall approach to games and the player experience. Based on the size of the club, the goals of the club, and the club’s priorities for player experience, what you can expect as a parent or player over the course of the year can be very different. Again, this is not a debate about right or wrong. It is more about what is right for your child, budget, time commitment, and goals for playing soccer at your child’s age group and skill level. Club requires a lot of commitment, and make sure that you are willing to sacrifice a bunch of things before going and entering the club. 

The hardest thing to do is align expectations between people who have different expectations. Although, an open discussion about expectations can give both parties a good base to align their individual expectations with each other. When expectations go unestablished, it leaves a lot of room for assumptions which usually leads to a season full of issues and misunderstandings. Although we all might not agree, it is much easier to have a mutual respect for one another’s opinions and actions when expectations are clearly outlines from the start of the season. By knowing where everyone stands, it is much easier to find common ground. Most importantly, by this type of collaborative approach, it is more likely the child playing the game will have a positive experience through the season which you expected. 

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